What does it mean for us to be “in” with a group that we join?  What are the requirements for membership?  Is it that we bring something to the group that it values?  Are we important because of the past credit or the promise of future pleasure?  Is agreement to core ideas and behavior the portal for entry or is solidarity in lifestyle what really matters?  Is belonging an evolved need only after the satisfaction of more base ones?  Does life together exist only in the temporal idea or as universal and even timeless?   Am I more “in” as I am homogeneous or when I am diverse?  What is the importance of a larger narrative that I respond to while living in the temporal social networks created for safety, achievement, pleasure, or for the aesthetics of life together?  In our relationships with our neighbor, or employer, a team member, a spouse or child, what is the essential requirement?  Eric Fromm in the Art of Loving says that to love is to be practitioners of knowing the other, respecting them as they are and can become, responsibility to the relationships asks of us, and to care with depth, breadth and sacrifice.  To be “in” may have lots of different requirements, but worthy leadership of great impact chooses to offer the gift of love when taking on the privilege of joining with others.

Leading is a constant for all of us. The opportunity for leadership is ubiquitous not sporadic. Every time you behave or think, you are having influence or impact on yourself and those around you. We would like to think that leadership is something that happens occasionally, but it truly is a 24/7 event.  To accept the idea that we cannot NOT have influence means we are always responsible for our actions regardless of whether we are conscious of our affect, purposeful with our actions, or self-aware of our influence.  For most people, leadership is thought more of as an organizational matter not so much as personal.  The idea is that leaders are those people who have positional authority, are “up front,” and have information to distinguish themselves or bring unique value to the situation.  An additional matter and one far more insidiously embedded into the psyche of most individuals centers around the matter that most people are driven to avoid pain and difficulty than to do what is right, needed or best concerning the sitautional need.  It isn’t an easy task to face and accept the reality that being responsible is important and that response-ability is important all the time.  As leaders who are always leading, the challenge is for us to bring a quality of presence and attention to the moment; collaborate with others to hear what is essential; and then to co-create value in response to the critical need of people and organizations.

December is a time when many of us contribute to organizations that contribute to the greater good of society. Chris Gardner whose life was recently made in to the movie, ‘The Pursuit of Happiness’, discuss his philosophy of giving to charity.

In it he discusses why giving money to the homeless can be misguided.

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